BTW - I got some more totally awesome stuff at this soiree! I received some excellent clothes (can you say "Calvin Klein", "Ralph Lauren", AND "Winnie the Pooh"? Yes please!), some super fantastic hand-made quilts (INCREDIBLE EFFORT!), and I even got a violet softball glove (I know, "violet", SO FITTING!) with a gym bag to match. I think it'll really help me snag foul balls at Fenway Park. Get ready Pops! Also, I'd like to holler at Nancy, Rae Anne, and Mary for making it all happen. You ladies are wonderful, can't wait to see you all on the outside :)
OK, so obviously the party is a valid reason for not mailbagging Friday morning. The remainder of the delays between Friday afternoon and this morning, uh, not so much.... When dad fired up the computer on Saturday I thought it was finally time. I had already selected the letters I was going to answer, so I was ready to rock! He quickly shot me down though while explaining that he had some serious preparations to do for his fantasy baseball (LAME!) draft on Sunday, and did not have time to take dictation at the moment. A few hours and a bunch of beers later, and he was completely USELESS! Mom warned me about this, but I guess I just didn't believe her. Fantasy sports are already interfering with our "relationship", and I haven't even arrived yet! I don't know all the inner workings of this fantasy sports situ, but I have a "feeling" this might be dad's last year in the league, if you catch my drift.
Regardless, we are now both ready (FINALLY!) to do some serious blogging, and I have been SO anxious I almost can't stand it! Are you as anxious as I am?! SUPER! Let's dive in:
Q: MaddieP, what's your take on "America's Next Top Model"? Emily - Brooklyn, NY
A: "Throw your hands in the air if you's a true playa'!" Emily, first off, big ups to Brooklyn! I haven't visited many of the other boroughs (two tiny thumbs DOWN for Queens and the Bronx just from what I've heard), but I think Biggie totally had it right when he stated that your's is SO the most thorough! I can't wait to come see it again. I think it will look especially awesome when viewed from the MaddiePMobile.
Now to get to answering your question. You know how I can go on and on, so I must remain focused. I am sorry to report that dad has not let me watch ANTM in its entirety yet, so it is very difficult for me to give you my official take (FRUSTRATING!). He said that we already have enough shows to watch, and that too much TV is not good for people my age. However, I "asked" mom to put the first season in our Netflix Queue, post-arrival, so I think I will be able to give you TONS more input in April about all the ANTM ladies!
I will say that I have seen enough bits and pieces to know that Tyra Banks is the host, (that's Tyra Banks fool!) so I do have some "comments" about her. Most of the time, I'll just look at her, shake my head, and think to myself "Well, I guess you can't fix crazy". That pretty much summarizes EVERYTHING she says or does on that show, or in her life for that matter. My favorite thing about Tyra, and I mean my FAVORITE thing, is the fact that she was able to become a model despite the fact that her head is gigantic! As a regular reader Emily, you know how concerned I am about the size of my melon, so whenever I get too overwhelmed with fear, I just think of Tyra (COMFORTING!). I mean, really! You could SO watch a movie on her forehead, and we're talking wide-screen, not the traditional 4:3 ratio. Three words of advice for you Tyra, KEEP THE BANGS! If those ever go out of style I think you'll go out of style with them. We call that "going down with the ship", if you will. I guess that is a bit mean, but let's be honest here, she is not exactly a super terrific person, so I have a really hard time feeling too bad :(
Hope to vogue with you soon Emily!
Q: MaddieP, who is your favorite SNL character? Claire Bear - South Grafton, MA
A: Hi Claire Bear, I love your name! I know Stephen Colbert keeps saying that bears are the number one threat to America, but you don't sound threatening at ALL! Anyhoo, I am slightly confused as to whether you are asking about my favorite character in a particular skit, or if you want to know who my favorite SNL cast member is. Don't worry Claire Bear, I won't leave you hanging. I'm going to answer BOTH! I am simply THAT intrigued by your question (AWESOME)!
My favorite character from a sketch is actually a tie between Brian Fellows and Robert Goulet (GOULET!). I just LOVE how Brian Fellows talks to all of the animals, and also how frustrated he gets with all of his guests. Sometimes I even imagine myself hosting, and just blurting out "I'm Madelyn Poppish!" over and over. SO funny, I KNOW! I especially enjoyed the time he thought that talking parrot stole his credit card and was ordering stuff on QVC. "That bird is not my doppelganger!"... O-M-G, TOO much! I'm Madelyn Poppish! See, it is SO hilarious!
Robert Goulet came in tied because of the "Coconut Bangers Ball (It's a WRAP!)" sketch. That one had me doing somersaults in here, let me tell you. "who let those dogs out? who let those dogs out? who let those little mutts GOOOOOO?!!!" I think I actually gave myself the hiccups once I was laughing so hard. I just cannot get over those pipes and the way Goulet croons. Plus, my uncle Scott does a super fantastic impression of Will Ferrell doing an impression of Robert Goulet. We've watched that skit so many times I honestly cannot keep track on my tiny fingers. It just doesn't get old.
My favorite cast member, surprise, is Will Ferrell. I think I have viewed his "Best Of" shows on DVD at least 6 or 7 times, and they still make me laugh. I love him as a Spartan Cheerleader, I love him as U.S. Flag-Thong Guy, I love him as Cowbell Player for BOC.... You get the idea ;) I especially liked the "giant baby" skit (even though it was gross, I know) because I felt like we really connected on that one. He was able to put into words, like I try to do in my blog, exactly what all us fetii are thinking even though we cannot talk. I'm actually getting a little misty-eyed just thinking about it. I think I just had a "moment". Sorry about that. I know it was supposed to be funny, but it was more than funny. That's what makes him so great!
I'll try to catch it "live" with you in the future Claire Bear!
Q: I have heard that your mom cannot even stand to be in the same room when American Idol is on. How are you able to develop such a detailed insight into the show considering your current location? Leto - Thornton, CO
A: Leto, Leto, Leto.... You have exposed a deep, dark, family secret, that I was hoping to avoid addressing in this blog..... Yes, it is true..... My mom, does in fact, DESPISE American Idol :( I can hear the gasps now from all of the avid maddiepandfriends members as I am sure you are all in complete shock. Never fear faithful readers, the situation is not nearly as dire as this revelation would lead you to believe.
Honestly, Leto, the present situ is really a tiny hurdle in the overall scheme of things since dad devised a plan before the season even began to deal with this, shall we say, " minor inconvenience". I am now going to layout this genius plan (AGAIN, SURPRISING!) that dad created so that I would not be denied the enjoyment that IS watching AI and constantly judging people. Mom is an avid reader of the blog, so I really hope this "confession" does not put my future enjoyment of the show into terrible jeopardy.
As you know, the show airs on Tuesday nights. However, mom actually gets home before the show even starts making same-night viewing totally impossible. Therefore, the whole plan springs into action the next day, Wednesday,. Well, this just so happens to fall on the same day that mom works the second of three 12-hour shifts for the week. Dad arrives home at least 3 hours earlier than mom, and is usually able to watch the entire show before she gets through the door. Until now, she has been entirely unaware that dad copies the show from the TIVO directly to his computer, and then from his computer to my IPod. So COOL! All of this before he even makes dinner (AMAZING!). We'll call this part of the plan "Phase 1 - AI Reconnaissance".
Then, what do you suppose mom's condition is when she finally walks through said door you may ask? SO tired! Bring on "Phase 2 - AI Investigation and Playback". We all have dinner and then she is basically ready to hit the sack. Unfortunately, it usually takes her about 2 hours to actually fall asleep (UNCOMFORTABLE!) after laying down, so dad is forced to set his "mental alarm clock" for 2300 hours. Are you still with me Leto? He wakes up, gives my foot a little nudge to let me know its "time", and then puts the headphone speakers up to my tiny ear so I can listen to the entire show! Immediately after the last performance, he then whispers a quick description of each performer so I can "put a face to the voice" (it helps for judging purposes) and make my decisions. The whole process runs like a well-oiled machine, let me tell you! One quick, tiny high-five, and then it's back to slumber land for dad, and back to the open-house party for me. No one even knows I've been gone!
The next morning, before he leaves for work, we execute the final part of the plan "Phase 3 - AI Evaluation and Judgment". I give him my opinions, and then he types them all into the blog at work before his 0900 break! PERFECT!
Leto, I know you are probably floored to think that dad and I would put this much effort into something so seemingly unimportant as a reality music show. I'm not going to lie, our AI fandom knows no bounds! It is what it is, and that's all I can say......
I am anxious to judge some people with you Leto!
Alright, dad is tapping on the womb and giving me the "wrap it up" signal. Apparently, his fantasy nerd draft is starting soon, so I am forced to sign off here. Look forward to more blogging this coming week. To whet your whistle, I'll tell you now that we have stories about Claire Bear's trip to Florida (with pics, yea!), "tales from Dazzle - the restaurant", and another jam-packed (ALREADY?! CRAZY!) mailbag. Hope you all had a totally fantastic weekend!
Later......
SO into:
- Starburst Fruit Chews
- Brooklyn (But not the Yankees! Nice try.)
- Bathrobes
- Flirtinis
SO not:
- Fantasy Sports
- Cracking Knuckles
- Folding Chairs
- Bracketology
No comments:
Post a Comment