Why Don’t You Take A Picture?? It’ll Last Longer!

O-M-G! I had no idea that my blogging, when combined with my overwhelming cuteness, would cause such a stir every time I go out in public. Between my mom and dad snapping endless pics, to people staring at me everywhere I go, I just CANNOT get a break. I went out to breakfast on Monday morning, trying to rock the incognito look, hiding under a bunch of clothes and a few blankets (BRRR, It was COLD!). I figured surely no one would recognize me. WRONG! I just settled in for a bottle and an omelette, got all cozy, and suddenly, out of nowhere, BAM, someone is at the table all up in my grill. “Look at the baby, look at the baby!” anonymous fan yelled. Well, let me tell you, it only takes one. Before I knew it, I was holding Monday morning service at table #5 for all of these lookie loos!

Don’t get me wrong, I am totally super flattered that all of these people are just SO interested in me and what my current situ is. I think I simply underestimated the “price of fame”, if you will. Britney, I am totally feeling your pain! And I’m not even “country” or anything even remotely close to that (No lap rides in the car for me, thanks for asking!). I really feel I should’ve taken more serious steps to remain completely anonymous, but I believe it is now too late. Whatever, I’ll roll with it cause that’s just what I do ;) All of this attention did inspire me to post some more pics today on my blog. I am PRAYING that these will satisfy the insatiable appetites of all my Denver fans, and allow me to get a little bit of peace and quiet while I’m cruising around Target or chilling at Café Europa. Stay tuned.

Someone please get that pacifier out of my ear. Thanks!

Mom and I post bath time... Finally WARM!

Just kickin' it in my room

YIKES! We look WAAAY too much alike!

I should also tell you (I don’t know if you can see it in the pics or not. If you answer “NOT”, that would be completely AWESOME!) I just realized yesterday that I totally have “baby acne”. Um, HELLO, isn’t acne supposed to start when you’re, like, 12 or 13 YEARS old. Mine started when I was, like, 12 or 13 DAYS old! I mean, COME ON! This totally FRICKING stinks! I am already having complexion issues and I haven’t even hit a month. Dad said to look on the bright side. He said I should use it to my advantage and call the Proactiv people to offer my services as a spokesbaby. What a great idea I thought (SHOCKING!). If anyone from Proactiv is reading this, and I’m sure someone is, please drop me a line or give me a jingle on Skype. I’ll send you my portfolio and list of credentials (it’s SUPER long, just an FYI) so we can work something out. Jessica S., I apologize in advance for becoming your inevitable replacement, sometimes things just happen. Sorry L

Mom suggested that, in the meantime, while I wait by the phone for my lifetime supply of Proactiv formula, that maybe taking a bath would help. I was like, “Bath? I’ve never had one of those before, let’s rock!” Well, the administration of said bath was the complete opposite of “enjoyment”, and I need to tell you right now, I was not a fan! My parental units are forced to use a minimal amount of water in the infant tub so that I am not at risk for drowning. I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to bathe in a “minimal amount of water”, but it’s NO garden party! Go sit in a puddle while someone sprinkles water over the rest of your exposed body. Or, if you don’t have a puddle handy, jump in the shower for 10 seconds, get your entire body soaked, then stand just outside of the stream of water, with only your hand still immersed, then write me and tell me how you feel. Are you all nice and warm?!! Heck, write in real-time so I know exactly how you’re feeling at that exact moment. I’m super curious!

It was like, my butt and thighs were nice and cozy and warm the entire time, while the rest of me was just completely FREEZING! Sure, mom or dad would squeeze a little warm water over my chest, arms, or feet, but that lasts, oh, say, 2 SECONDS! Then it’s back to IceTown, population ME! After the arms and feet, they squeezed a little more warm water over my head as if to toy with me, offering temporary promises of total body warmth and comfort, but immediately pulled it all away with one brush of the washcloth (CURSES!). Two long (but still tiny) thumbs down for the whole bath experience.

The only highlight of “bath time” AKA “water-boarding: part deux” was the aftermath where I got to snuggle up in my bathrobe and lounge around the house. Here is the pic:

Don’t I look SO super comfy?! I was! This photo has “hand me a corncob pipe stuffed with your finest tobacco and plop me in a leather recliner” written ALL over it! I mean, seriously. I could just hang out, post-bath, in this little piece of terrycloth heaven for DAYS! Thank you Nancy, great shower gift choice! I might just start wearing this robe everywhere.

The last thing I wanted to mention is I am really enjoying the food they serve at Casa De Poppish. Sure, it’s always the same, but it’s simple and consistent, just like Chef Ramsay likes. Big ups Gordon, love Kitchen Nightmares (SPOOKY!)! However, dad always gets a little frustrated since I seem to never completely finish my meal. I always leave about 2 sips in the bottom of the bottle and he can’t figure out why. Dad, let me put it into terms you can relate to. My bottle is no different than that of YOUR average beer bottle, and we all know that the last 2 sips are ALL backwash, NO substance! What makes you think I’d be any more interested in drinking that down than you are? I may be just a BABY, but I have standards too! I’m not complaining, I’m just saying.

That’s all for now. Feel free to save all the photos I posted on to your hard-drive and stare away!

Later.....

SO into:

• Crossing My Eyes
• Strolling
• Sitting Sidewayz
• Manny Ramirez (POW!)

SO not:

• Constipation
• Unanticipated Wardrobe Changes
• Baby Wipes
• Burping